In a marital relationship, both you and your spouse must communicate. I have seen too many times in counseling where one spouse refuses or withholds sex from their mate. If you are in this situation, ask yourself how you may be responsible. Guys, sex is not just for your pleasure. Ladies, you need to communicate clearly to your spouse when something is not pleasurable or not going well with your husband. God desires to give you pleasure and He desires that you be a pleasure to one another. Discuss with one another what brings pleasure and what does not. If something is not going well, please, please talk to your spouse without undermining their confidence.
It is not Biblical to deprive your spouse of sex. You should never be selfish in any way with your spouse, physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually. At times, it may be a sacrifice or an unselfish thing you do to have a physical relationship. Maybe you do it in spite of being tired, having a headache, etc. etc. A sexual problem is often a symptom of a bigger problem, which is selfishness. As Christians, should not be selfish in our lives or in our physical relationships. You entered into a covenant with your spouse and your body is no longer yours according to 1st Corinthians 7:4.
Just as Jesus Christ died for you, so should you and your spouse should die to selfishness. Not just sexually but in all ways. You should please your spouse and submit to one another’s likes as long as it is not contrary to the Word of God. Your nature is to be self-centered, but Jesus wants you to be others-centered. Friend, consider one another.
Take time with your spouse and communicate your likes and dislikes with one another. Friend, by considering one another, I will promise you that your marriage will be better than you have imagined, your spouse will be blessed and God will bless you.
Life Lesson: If you are married, you should be having sex or making love on a regular basis.
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David McGee is the founder of Cross The Bridge Ministries as well as a pastor, teacher and author. He may be contacted using the form here.